Having sex for the first time is a scary experience for most everyone.
A series of I'm not sure what I'm doing, why does it feel like that or is this good for them, first-times are hardly ones for the history books. There is a world of things no one tells you before you decide to have sex for the first time.
As means to aid that, we are listing down some of the most common first-time sex questions women may have, in the hopes to give the lot of you a little bit more confidence moving forward henceforth.
Check them out.
#1 Does penetrative sex hurt?
Well yes, and no. This really depends on the individual woman. For some the experience would hurt, as your body adjusts to new movements, whereas for others, it could just feel uncomfortable.
Having sex is relearning to use your body, or parts you weren't quite sure could function in a certain way, so of course, there is an adjustment period to get used to.
However, if you are having long term pain after the experience, then consulting a doctor would be wise.
#2 Will I bleed when his penis enters me?
Again, yes and no. Some people bleed because the hymen tears a little when the penis enters the vaginal hole, whereas for some, it just resorts to stretching, so no.
If you do bleed a little, do not be alarmed, you're not broken, it is perfectly normal.
#3 I don't think his penis can fit in there
Believe it or not, penises fit into vaginas most times.
A vagina is 3-7 inches long, so fitting in there, isn't as big as a problem as you think it is. You just need to take it slow, steady, and when your body's ready, you'll know.
#4 Is birth control good enough, must I also use a condom?
Now this is a conversation for you and your partner. The two of you need to talk things out, and try to understand what works.
Of course using a condom is a 98% effective form of birth control and preventing STIs, but to each their own, so long as you're practicing safe sex.
#5 Is sex only sex if it goes in?
This is the patriarchy talking. Sex is about you, your experience, your pleasure, your vulnerability and the intimacy you share with your partner. This means that you define what sex is. It does not have to be penetrative, to be deemed sex.
#6 What position would hurt the least?
Also something based on respective individuals, use the position which you feel most comfortable in. If being on top, makes you feel like you can control entryway and movements, so be it.
#7 How long does sex take?
It could take from less than a minute, up to 7 minutes. Each couple is different.
#8 What about orgasms?
What about them? You could get one, but you may also not get one. The presence of one does not mean sex isn't sex.
Sex can still be sex without an orgasm. First times are mostly for exploring each other, so it would be best to not have any expectations going in. However, should you crave it, then strive for it, and you may not be disappointed.
#9 Can I have sex if I'm on my period?
If that is something the both of you are okay with, then why not? Still use protection though.
#10 Should I use lube for penetrative sex?
This isn't a must, but it can help reduce friction, which may in turn make you less uncomfortable, or in pain. Besides that, it can also feel pleasurable, so that's a plus point.
#11 Will it be good?
The first times are mostly awkward, nerve-wrecking, uncomfortable and not at all what you see on tv, or porn (if you have watched porn). Even if it isn't the first time for your partner, it is still their first time with you.
The key is being honest with one another, knowing that there is a learning curve to sex, and being okay with going as slow as either of you needs to.
First-times often require a lot of planning like, location, protection, deciding what kind to have, enthusiastic consent, what the two of you personally like, so on and so forth.
It is doing what you can to make each other feel a lot safe, the least scared and the most aroused. The whole experience will not be a bed of roses, but with time, it will only get better.
