Anyone who has been through puberty will have a sex drive. It is not something to be ashamed of and everyone has their own ways and level of comfort in displaying their sexual desires. It is, however, a shame that our education system lacks proper sexual education, resulting in many people growing up without it, making it a much more taboo topic in our more traditional society.

Today, we'll have a quick Q&A styled post to answer some of the most popular questions that you want to know but will probably never ask. At the end of this, you'll hopefully know more about yourself and the opposite sex.

1. Do men and women have different needs?

On average, men's sexual desires come much more randomly and does not seem at all cyclical or periodic. Any suitable stimulation can cause a reaction. They are also able to go from being sexually activated to finishing off within a short period of time. As such, men's desires come and go quite easily.

On the other hand, women's sexual desires are affected by their menstrual cycles and hormones secretion, making it more periodic. Most women report having a higher sex drive during ovulation and right before menstruation. This is due to the secretion of estrogen which is correlated to a woman's libido. During and right after the menstrual period, the drop in estrogen and lutein will cause a similar drop in sexual desires.

Besides that, women take longer to be sexually initiated and require both mental and physical stimulation. That is why foreplay (such as kissing, sweet talking, hugging) is so important to women. On average, it takes about 10 minutes for a woman to go from being stimulated to getting sexually excited.

2. Do women have a lower sex drive than men?

This is a definite no! Women have an equal (sometimes, even higher) sex drive to men. This is a myth that arises due to societal restrictions and taboos that have traditionally forced women to suppress their own sexual desires and needs. The good news is that as time changes, so have society, and women have much more freedom to express their sexual drives.

3. Does a woman's sex drive change with age?

Yes, it does. Every woman is different, but their sex drives according to age can be generalized into one of 4 categories.

Between 14-20 years old, hormone secretion is at its peak, therefore it is normal to feel a very strong sexual desire during ovulation and before menstruation.

Between 20-30 years old, a woman has physically and mentally matured. On average, most women have had a certain amount of sexual encounters and experience, so their libidos will seem much stronger and more obvious. Apart from the late stages of pregnancy and right after birth (when their sexual desires seem more suppressed), women should fulfill all their physiological needs.

Between 30-45 years old, a woman's menstrual period and hormone secretion has mostly stabilized. At this point, women become more active and initiative. They become sexually excited much faster and will very likely have a stronger sex drive than their male counterparts.

After 45 years old, women start to enter menopause and ovulation begins to slow down. This will cause a fall in sex drives. If one continues to supplement and replenish their hormones, it will be easy to keep up a healthy libido. There are also some who become more sexually active after menopause as there are no more pregnancy worries.

4. Why do men get sexually stimulated so easily?

It is biologically programmed in men to have sexual release through semen excretion. When the sperm has fully filled the testes, there will be an urge to release and a spike in energy levels due to the masculine hormones. As such, men seem to be easily triggered and feel the need to release the tension. At that point, even the tiniest hint of initiation can lead to a man being sexually excited.

Of course, this sexual "tension" is strongest throughout puberty and adulthood, but will slowly fall off as men grow older. Sperm secretion reduces and they will not feel the urge to release as often as they did.

5. Is a low libido in woman related to endocrine levels?

An average woman will see a spike in sexual drive within the period of ovulation and a reduction after menstruation. For those with irregular menstrual periods, the secretion of endocrine will be affected, causing other hormone levels to be affected as well. This results in a generally lower sex drive.

6. Does suppressing sexual desires for a long time affect health?

A long term suppression of sexual desires can have sever effects mentally and physically. Like any muscle, if the brain is deprived of sexual stimulus for too long, it'll slowly lose it's ability to feel stimulus or excitement.

A regular and healthy sex life can increase one's happiness, regulate the mind and body, and release stress. Keeping your desires pushed down is like pressing down on a pressure cooker. Besides, not having any physical contact with the opposite sex will very easily lead to self-isolation and trouble in retaining relationships.

7. Do men ever have low sex drives?

Usually, we only hear stories about women not wanting to have sex due to a sudden dip in sexual desires. However, men too have times where sex does not seem appealing to them. This might be due to a couple of reasons:

i. They are ill or have irregular hormone secretion.

ii. They are over-exhausted, causing their libido to be suppressed and they shy away from any excitement.

iii. They have been overly sexual, such has masturbating too much or having too much sex in a short period of time. This might affect the spinal nerve, making it hard to have or maintain an erection.

8. Does alcohol help with sex?

A little alcohol before sex is like an aphrodisiac for all parties involve. Alcohol acts as a mental lubricant and can help loosen the mind and take away any nervousness.

However, if a man consumes too much alcohol, it might affect his sex drive. Alcohol has a natural suppression effect on the central nervous system, causing a retardation effect on our reactions. As such, stimulation from the penis is not fully transmitted to the brain, causing a difficulting in maintaining an erection. Long term alcohol abuse is also poisonous to the sex glands, causing irregular testis sizes, reduced fertility, and erectile dysfunction.

The suppression effect applies to women too, weakening any stimulation felt by the vagina and making it harder for a woman to reach and orgasm.

Therefore, it is only healthy to have a small amount of alcohol before sex, but never good to drink over one's limit. Not only is it bad for your sex life, it is also generally bad for your health.

Hopefully this helps clear some doubts about sex and your sexual desires. Remember, it is not wrong to have a high or low sex drive, so long as you remember to keep it safe and healthy!